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Johanna, the Melodious Virtuoso - Contest Entry by Nitron2097
Johanna, the Melodious Virtuoso - Contest Entry
Entry for :iconalanmac95:'s Yu-Gi-Oh! Contest. Nyah!
The artwork is by sorano kanata from danbooru.

I love Melodious too much to not make a card for them. :D
The name is based on Joahnn Sebastien Bach, as all the Melodious monsters have a music term or composer name in their names.
The effect supports the whole Melodious arch-type. You can instantly fusion into another Melodious monster when you summon this with it's contact fusion effect, the token is a "Maestra" Melodious monster which gives you other fusion plays during that turn or later in the game, and the battle effect (which I think I worded correctly ;P ) allows you to Special Summon your other "Melodious" monsters from your hand to gain their effects (Shopina, Mozarta, Tamtam) while having a massive board presence. The only bonus is having Canon on the field to switch this between ATK and DEF position.

I really wanted to make this a lockdown card, but the Melodious arch-type doesn't really do that... :(

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Johanna, the Melodious Virtuoso"
8 Stars = LIGHT, Fairy-type

2 "Melodious" monsters
When this card is fusion summoned; Special Summon 1 "Melodious Maestra" token (Fairy type/LIGHT Attribute/4 stars/2000 ATK/1500 DEF) to your field; this token can't be destroyed by battle. The first time a "Melodious" monster on your field is attacked each turn (before damage calculation); You may return that monster to your hand and Special Summon 1 "Melodious" monster from your hand; that monster is unaffected by card effects and can't be destroyed in battle this turn. Once while this card is face up on your field; You may fusion summon 1 "Melodious" monster from your extra deck, using monsters from your side of the field as fusion materials.
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Damn...I'm glad I'm not Subaru. :)

Re:Zero: Starting Life in Another World... This is one I've been waiting for since Yen Press announced they had acquired the license. I have to say, with the way fans have been hating on this franchise, I just had to get my hands on the book. Since most of the spiel is coming from the same people that think SAO is the end-all-be-all-show-of-greatness "that you're not an otaku unless you have Kirito's 'Elucidator' and an Asuna ona..." Stabbed with a Fork! ...SMACK!
What I'm trying to say is, the amount of venom that's out there for Re:Zero convinced me of one thing...that it, at its core, probably has a VERY intriguing story and characters.
...YAY! I was right! :D

And the prose is not disappointing either.

Nagatsuki Tappei's prose is original, and at the same time, a bit familiar. The writing style builds from the opening of the book. For one thing, I love - since 'Overlord' was my last read and that story took longer to get moving than the line for a bathroom at Comiket - that you're thrown into the situation with no explanation at all from the very start of the book. This is refreshing, and is actually the way I prefer to write. Sometimes you just can't get away with no exposition at all, but in this case, not only does it work, but it's actually a great engine to get everything moving. :sherlock: From the flash forward prologue (which happens again at the end of the first chapter), I couldn't help but ask questions. "Why did this happen? Who's this girl?"
It's great when a fellow writer gets a reaction out of me, whatever that reaction is; it means the prose is working its magic. Winner 

From there on you're forced to learn the circumstances of Subaru's situation as he does. No useless narrative exposition here; just raw story action the whole way through. :reading:

One thing that I really enjoy about Re:Zero is the characters. Nagatsuki is always true to the characters. Here's where I'll probably lose some of you...
Subaru is a very interesting and dynamic character.
[ reaction of reader of this journal...:puke: ]
Yep, I said it. Subaru is interesting and dynamic.
"No, :iconnitron2097:, he's not! He just a self-centered, egotistical @$$hole!"
...Yep! And that's why he's awesome! He's driving this whole story forward! It's funny how a lot of male protagonists seem to be self-centered and full of themselves. It could have something to with the fact he's a GUY...and a NEET...who just stumbled in to his fantasy!New 
Mind you, this doesn't just stick out with Subaru. Satella and Felt are great examples of this, too. Felt's one track mind actually made me think of Jack Sparrow a little bit; she's entirely focused on her goal, regardless of the circumstances (it's just too bad she couldn't PLAN like he did...). "Satella" - not giving too much away here ;P - is almost too selfless for her own good, and it's great this comes back to be integral in the story later on. All in all, Re:Zero has great characters, and with this being only volume one of the novel, we haven't even met the best two yet! Yeah, you know who I mean...:huggle:

The changes of pace are a great separator for the story too (though that's automatically worked in with the whole "Reverse After Death" concept). The speed of the story is shifting from chaotic to mellow while slowly building to a break-neck climax at the ending...and I love how this adds an extra element to the feel of the story. For example, when Subaru accidentally bumps into Elsa on "Run #4" in the slum...his reaction is GOLD! Fear She doesn't know it, but he's met her before, and you as the reader know it since you experienced it Chainsaw . It's fun to know more as the reader than the characters do sometimes. Even the pace shift in that one scene is enough to hook you...and it's a great "Oh $#!&" moment.

Another good thing is the simplicity of the prose. If "Satella" had shown up in 'Overlord,' the introduction to her magic probably would have went something like this:
"The girl WAS a half-elf. Half-elves can use magic. The particular type of magic WAS dependent on the tribe. In Liginuka, there WERE X tribes of elves; the A, the B, the C, the D, the E, the F, and the G. The A WERE able to use X magic, the B WERE able to use Y magic..."
Fear the katana! No, the katana's for myself. I'm going to stab my eyes out now.

Nagatsuki is smarter than that. She just glazes over the whole thing. Yes, she can use magic. Why? BECAUSE SHE"S AN ELF! Duh! And she just goes ahead and uses it without a half page venture through the "War And Peace Book of Liginuka Magic Laws." Less is more; this is another rule to live by when writing.

The one thing I don't like is the voice. The story is written in past-tense third person point of view (POV), which is my least favorite POV to write in. Instead of explaining, I'll just use an example of a passage from the book, first as written, then in my favorite voice (first person, present tense).

- Here's the original passage (Chapter 4, Page 186 - also this is why Elsa's my favorite character Shocked ):

Subaru saw the blood dripping, and a bit of steam was rising from the frozen ground.
The blood was coming from Elsa's right foot. She was standing barefoot just out of the line of fire from Puck's attack, and bleeding profusely from her right foot, and it wasn't hard to see why. After all, she had sliced off the sole of her foot.
"I was afraid I might lop the whole foot off, seeing as how I hurried. That was a close one."
"Even if you only cut that much, it must hurt a lot," said Puck.
"Well yes, you're right. But it's wonderful. It makes me feel alive, and in addition to that..."
In response to Puck's worried sounding words, Elsa nodded with a look of ecstasy in her eyes, and without hesitation pushed her bleeding foot against a piece of ice. A sound that sounded like air shattering came erotically from Elsa's throat, and then immediately afterward she took her knife to the ice around her foot. With that, she had managed to stop the bleeding with the ice.
"It's a little hard to move, but this should be enough," said Elsa with a laugh, clicking her ice shoe against the ground, looking as though she was having fun.

- Pretty nice ("was" count = 5 :( ), but let's change it to first person, present tense and see how it would read (with just a few aesthetic changes [I REALLY hate adverbs]):

I see the blood dripping as a bit of steam rises from the frozen ground.
The blood's coming from Elsa's right foot. She's standing barefoot just out of the line of fire from Puck's attack with blood pouring from her heel, and it's not hard to see why. After all...she just sliced off the sole of her foot!
"I was afraid I might lop the whole foot off, seeing as how I hurried. That was a close one."
"Even if you only cut that much, it must hurt a lot," says Puck, unnerved by the sight.
"Well yes, you're right. But it's wonderful. It makes me feel alive, and in addition to that..."
Elsa nods with a look of ecstasy in her eyes, and without hesitation, she pushes her bleeding foot against a piece of ice. Her euphoric cry of painful pleasure pounds my eardrums, and without even seeming to think, she takes her knife to the ice around her foot, hacking it free.
Well...she stopped the bleeding...
"It's a little hard to move, but this should be enough," says Elsa with a laugh, clicking her ice shoe against the ground, looking as though she's having fun.

Which passage do you like better? Giggle 
The reason I choose first person present tense (aside from the fact that past tense 'to-be' verbs like "was" aren't needed) is the feel the words give the story. It sounds as though the action is right there in front of you. Also, you can do more with less words. As a bonus, we're also INSIDE Subaru's head, so I don't have to describe him being nervous after writing his dialogue; I can do both in one line. "Well...she stopped the bleeding..." The ellipsis breaks up the wording, implying that he's scared. Also, it's easier to drive points home in first person; do you get more from Elsa's reactions in the original passage or my re-write of it?
I think if Nagatsuki had written this in first person, present tense, the story might have gained a bit more of a frenetic feel to it, especially in the action scenes.

That said, I'll definitely be reading the rest of this series. Re:Zero is a great story; the writing is sound and the characters are memorable. I can't say if the "Reverse After Death" concept is recycled from 'Kagerou Daze' since I've only listened to Jin's song and haven't watched 'Mekaku City Actors,' nor read it since the 'Kagerou Daze' novel isn't that far yet, but it's definitely more original than 'Overlord's pathetic SAO reboot. I say get this one and once you've read it, watch the anime! Popcorn Late!

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Josh
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College student and fiction writer - un-published as of yet.
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:iconryu-tarou:
ryu-tarou Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Underwater photography of Momoko
【Complete 80%】
Art by MAGNUS-8M
Request by ryu-tarou
magnus-8m.deviantart.com/art/U…

Ryuutarou Momoko Request
【Complete 100%】
Art by MAGNUS-8M
magnus-8m.deviantart.com/art/R…
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:iconschneetzer:
schneetzer Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2016
Daww

Found you here > w < ) /
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:iconnitron2097:
Nitron2097 Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Sorry...don't recognize the name... ^^;
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:iconschneetzer:
schneetzer Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2016
well, it's YasumeYukito ' w ' )/
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:iconnitron2097:
Nitron2097 Featured By Owner Edited Jul 25, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Oh, okay! Cool!
I seriously would like to become as good of an artist as you! :D [ kneels before new sensei ]
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(1 Reply)
:iconmattjohn1992:
mattjohn1992 Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2016  Hobbyist Artist
great Job. maybe your take a look a my work
what you think 
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:iconnitron2097:
Nitron2097 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Not bad. :)
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:iconmattjohn1992:
mattjohn1992 Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2016  Hobbyist Artist
thanks you. I will give you idea you like that
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:iconvictoria-ishikawa:
Victoria-Ishikawa Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2016
thanks so much for the watch :)
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:iconnitron2097:
Nitron2097 Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Np. ;P
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